film thoughts - Closer

I'm not going to donate a great deal of my time to dissecting this abomination. I really just want to warn you.

This would have to be one of the poorer excuses for screenwriting I have seen in years. This coupled with actors who should know better, who somewhere along the line realised they should have known better and consequently became incredibly self-conscious, made for a horrid viewing experience and a tangible rage at having paid to see it.

Jude Law, Natalie Portman and Clive Owen are all fine actors in their own ways, but they erred in their choice here. While a couple of times you noted moments they can walk away from this happy about, for the most part they just struggle with awkward, overly cute, laboured writing, and even they can't hide it.

The blandness which emanates from the largely interior-based shot list (which I'm sure Nichols would argue was deliberate, but I would put to you it was because they blew the budget on the talent) is mind numbing and the cinematography completely uninspired to the point of being robotic. While there was a uniqueness in the lack of soundtrack, this didn't help any either and smacked of cluelessness ("Let's keep it still and focus on the characters - no distractions."). Misfire.

Altogether, a real waste of time, and not remotely worthy of a trip to the cinema. I'm not even sure it's worth a rental once it hits the weekly section.

Harsh, but fair.